June 19, 2003

Welcoming New Students to Cal

It's been a long time since I have updated this thing. I think my last post dates back to the day I moved into Unit 3 for CalSO. I haven't updated with good reason however. In the last month or so, I have had very little time for anything but CalSO. The first two weeks (last weeks of May) were spent in training, known as Camp CalSO. It was pretty intense, but at the same time, I found it to be very beneficial. After two weeks with 13 hour days, programs started. As of now, I have worked one parent program, two transfer programs, and three freshman programs. The only reason I am able to update today is because I didn't end up going to Southern California, where two more CalSO programs are happening on Friday and Saturday. We are about half way through CalSO and I had time to think and sleep in so I decided to update my blog and enlighten the world as to how my summer is going.

In terms of CalSO, I'm having a great time doing programs. I have gotten to be very loud and 'enthusiastic,' and even 'school-spirited' if you will. In addition, I seem to have lost all inhibitions about public speaking. I find this to be the most significant thing I have gained from CalSO to this date. One example that demonstrates this new found loss of shame is when I presented my First Year Experience earlier this week for the freshman program. I was pretty sick and feverish, drugged up on Tylenol, and eating cough drops. Also, the presentation was in front of a packed audience in 155 Dwinelle - a crowd of about 400 people.

It had been a long time since I gave a 15 minute speech in front of that many people, but the funny thing was that I never felt nervous during the course of the entire presentation. In fact, quite the opposite -- I felt completely comfortable, was able to speak clearly, and even tell some jokes. Thinking about the presentation in retrospect, I realize how far I have come in the last few years and last few weeks, being able to be completely comfortable in front of a group of people, no matter how large, and articulate myself without feeling the fear of embarrassment. So much have I changed, that I even did a small dance up on stage - no shame! I never had too much stage fright, but having done this presentation, I realize there is never a reason to be nervous about a presentation. The main thing that I finally have come to terms with is that no one really cares what you do and moreover, you shouldn't care what others think. I seriously feel like I have no shame anymore, and I'm excited about that. If I can do the Time Warp in front of a bunch of incoming freshman and parents, I don't think I'll be nervous about doing much else.

So what have I been doing when I'm not doing CalSO? What kind of question is that? I'm never not doing CalSO. The programs usually are scheduled back to back, with at most 28 hours off between, so basically in the last few weeks, I haven't spoken or seen anyone outside of CalSO for more than 5 minutes. In fact, the isolation is so extensive that I feel weird when people outside of CalSO come to the dorms or hang out during our off time. I guess the one good thing about having done some many programs is that it has all become very routine and now I don't need to stress about preparing for the next day. Summer has been really fun so far, and I'm glad I decided to do CalSO rather than dreaded summer school or worse, a job!

The one thing that hasn't stopped since summer started is my frivilous expenditure of money. In the past few weeks, I have bought a new stereo, a baseball glove, a hundred dollars worth of DVDs, and about sixty dollars worth of clothes. But hey, I have free food and free housing, so I guess that justifies it, right? I can't wait until I get my CalSO stipend and am able to buy some more computer stuff. Speaking of computers, I'm about half way done with the new version of rohitsrealm.com, and have been running solely on FreeBSD since coming to the dorms. Once I get my TV Card and webcam working in Unix, I see no need to ever go back to Windows. So what's up for the rest of the summer? Well, I got about a month left exactly of welcoming new students to Cal, then about two weeks home in Irvine, then back up to Berkeley for the fall semester and hall staff training.